Home Again

‘Home sweet home,’ Toko said, when they arrived back. She bypassed the lounge to collapse face down on their bed, dumping her bag on the way. Komaru trailed behind her.

‘You’re not going to sleep, are you?’

‘Why not?’ Toko said. ‘Do you think I got any decent sleep on that boat?’ She rolled back over to look up at Komaru, bunching her shirt up in the process, so that her waist peeped out.

‘I was hoping we could do something other than sleep,’ Komaru said.

‘I’m not cooking,’ Toko grumbled. ‘We can get something delivered.’

‘Something else,’ Komaru said. Maybe Toko was still too naive to get it, so Komaru climbed onto the bed beside her, and she laid an arm over her and groped her breast quite blatantly.

‘You mean that.’

‘Uh-huh,’ Komaru said. Toko wasn’t wearing a bra, and it was easy for Komaru to tweak her nipple through the fabric of her shirt.

‘Well, I guess that’s alright.’

‘Only alright?’

‘It’s meant to help you get to sleep, right? Not that I’d know about something like that.’

Komaru looked down at her fondly. ‘You know, Toko-chan, you can just do it for the sake of doing it.’

‘Maybe if you’re –’ Toko met her eyes and looked guilty. ‘It’s different for me. I can’t just say things like “wanna do it?”’

‘I don’t think I said it like that.’

Toko placed her hand over Komaru’s – not to move it, but only idly. Her hand was cool. Toko’s chest rose and fell beneath their twinned hands. Maybe they could just stay like this until they fell asleep. That would be okay too. Komaru had been falling asleep beside Toko for a long time. She could wait a little longer.

Suddenly, Toko lifted herself up on her elbows; Komaru took her hand back surprisedly.

‘You know what I do want to do?’ Toko said.

‘What’s that?’

‘I want you to take your shirt off.’ Toko fidgeted with the edge of her own shirt; Komaru could tell there was a next coming.

‘Okay.’ Komaru sat up so that she could pull her shirt off over her head. However many times she’d changed in front of Toko before, it felt different to be watched. The look in Toko’s eyes was bordering on lascivious.

Komaru dropped her shirt on the floor. ‘What next?’

‘Next,’ Toko said, ‘I wanna bury myself in your tits.’

She launched herself into Komaru with no more warning than that, her arms around Komaru’s back and her face pressed into her chest. Komaru looked down at her with surprise. She stroked Toko’s hair, trying to ease out some of the tangles, and Toko sighed against her skin. She turned her head slightly, her cheek against the middle of Komaru’s bra.

‘They’re just excessive,’ Toko said. She drew one hand around to squeeze Komaru’s breast.

‘I can’t help that,’ Komaru said. It made her feel hot, Toko pressing her face against her, the proprietal way she felt Komaru up.

Toko slipped two fingers under the top of Komaru’s bra.

‘Liar,’ Toko muttered. She pushed down the cup of Komaru’s bra so that her breasts spilled out the top. Fondled her some more, so that Komaru felt it right between her legs. Then, looking a little more nervous, Toko licked the skin of Komaru’s breast up to her nipple, and she pulled Komaru’s nipple into her mouth.

Komaru gasped.

Toko brought her other hand round, so that she was squeezing both of Komaru’s breasts while latheing her nipple with her tongue. Her hands might have been cool, but her mouth was hot.

Toko moved her head back and flicked Komaru’s nipple with her fingers. She snickered a little, like it was something Komaru should be embarrassed about.

‘Toko-chan.’

‘What? You know your breasts are just asking to be groped.’

‘If you’re going to talk about them like that, I won’t let you.’

Her voice must have been sharp, because when Toko looked back up at her, she was shame-faced.

‘Sorry,’ she said, and rested her head back against Komaru’s chest.

Komaru sighed. ‘I forgive you.’ She stroked her hand through Toko’s hair. ‘Do you want to have a shower?’

Toko stiffened. ‘Are you saying I’m dirty?’

‘I mean, we did spend three nights on a boat ...’ Komaru patted Toko’s shoulder. ‘I’ll go first.’

Toko shifted so that she could get off the bed, and then sat on the edge with her hands together.

‘Did I ruin things?’ she asked.

‘No. It’s just nicer to do some things when you’re clean, I think.’

Toko looked at her piteously. ‘ ... some things?’

‘Uh-huh. I’ll let you imagine what those might be.’ Komaru smiled at Toko, before she went to wash up.

The thing was, Komaru already knew somewhat more about Toko’s fantasies than she’d ever wanted to. She knew Toko thought of herself as a masochist, that she had a penchant for degrading talk. But Komaru didn’t. It wasn’t that Komaru expected Toko to change altogether. Toko could have whatever fantasies she wanted. But Komaru wanted to be treated like something precious, not to be made self-conscious. It wasn’t like she’d asked for the body she had; she couldn’t help how other people felt when they looked at her.

Maybe her shower was a little longer than usual – Toko seemed anxious when she came out. She jumped to her feet right away, like she meant to get out the way.

‘Your turn,’ Komaru said, keeping her voice cheerful.

‘Okay.’ Toko looked like she might apologise again; Komaru didn’t want that. She flopped onto the bed and ignored her; soon, she heard the shower going again. She sat up again.

Komaru wasn’t sure this wasn’t making a mistake, still – for her and Toko to try and turn their friendship into something else. She’d hate it if this screwed things up.

Toko’s shower was faster than Komaru’s had been – she’d only put her hair in a loose bun and not washed it, and as she approached the bed, she pulled her hair loose again and dropped the hair tie on the bedside table. She sat on the bed next to Komaru, and Komaru slumped her head onto Toko’s shoulder. She took advantage of the position to peek down the collar of Toko’s robe.

‘Shall we start again?’ Komaru murmured. She lifted her head and Toko acquiesced to kiss her. Komaru leaned into her, and undid the sash of her robe, before taking Toko’s hand and placing it back on her breast. She could feel Toko trembling.

Komaru undid the sash of Toko’s robe too.

Toko broke the kiss, to rest her forehead against Komaru’s. She let her hand drop to Komaru’s waist.

‘I ... go easy on me.’

‘Hm?’

‘I ...’ Toko pulled away, and she pulled her knees up against her chest. ‘I don’t really know,’ she said, ‘why you’d want to do this with me.’

‘Because I love you?’

Toko winced. ‘You say that sort of thing too easily.’

Komaru frowned. ‘Only to you.’

‘Even if you do,’ Toko said, ‘I’m ... like this.’ She looked away from Komaru, her hair hiding her face.

‘You’re ... shy?’ That didn’t fit with Toko’s behaviour earlier.

‘I mean I’m ugly!’ Toko said. ‘And I have these scars –’ she gestured to her thighs, the souvenirs from her Genocider days – ‘and I don’t know why you’d be attracted to me.’

‘Maybe I have terrible taste?’

Toko glared at her, and Komaru laughed – but not too heartedly.

‘I know what you look like, Toko-chan. I have seen you naked before. And your scars.’ She reached out to brush the ridged skin with her fingertips. ‘That’s all just you, Toko-chan.’

Toko made a face.

‘You’re not ugly,’ Komaru said. She took Toko’s hand in hers, and brought it to her lips to kiss. ‘I’ve never thought you were ugly.’ She turned Toko’s hand to kiss the heel of her palm. Toko still had her knees high against her chest, but now Komaru thought she was hiding a blush. ‘I bet you can be sexy too if you want to, Toko-chan.’

‘What does that even mean?’ Toko muttered, as Komaru moved her mouth to her wrist.

‘It means,’ Komaru said, ‘you shouldn’t hide yourself.’ She laced her fingers in Toko’s.

‘Isn’t being coy sexy too?’

Komaru laughed again, more freely. ‘Maybe,’ she said. ‘If it’s you, Toko-chan.’

She brushed Toko’s hair back behind her ear; slowly, Toko lowered her knees, so that she was sitting with her legs bent to the side instead of in front of her. She was a little stiff, like she still wanted to hide herself. Komaru ran her hand down Toko’s arm, comforting.

Toko sighed. ‘Maybe you can just shove me back on the bed and we can stop talking about it.’

‘Is that what you want?’ Komaru said. ‘You want me to be on top.’

‘Stop talking about it, I said.’

Komaru didn’t shove her back – she coaxed her back. Ran her hands along Toko’s legs until Toko laid them out flat; guided her backwards, with a hand on the back of her neck, and with kisses. She slid her hands down Toko’s breasts, and kissed her stomach.

‘You’re not going to do anything funny, are you?’ Toko said. There was a tight note to her voice.

‘I don’t know what you mean,’ Komaru said. Which was true in a sense – if Toko couldn’t bring herself to say something, Komaru couldn’t know what she meant. It was funny, how Toko could switch between crudity and naivety like that. Cute.

Komaru kissed Toko’s belly, and she ran a hand up the back of Toko’s thigh, to the crease between her leg and her ass.

‘Komaru.’ Toko’s voice had turned whiny.

‘That’s my name,’ Komaru said, and knew that Toko would narrow her eyes at that.

If Toko wanted her to stop, she could say so directly. Komaru went from caressing her thighs to parting them, so that Toko’s pussy was exposed to her.

‘You don’t have to look,’ Toko said. ‘It’s embarrassing.’

‘Why?’ Komaru said. She ran her fingers over Toko’s labia; Toko’s leg jerked so that Komaru was almost hit. She kissed Toko’s knee instead. Then she leaned forward, her eyes moving back up Toko’s body to her face, her lips that were redder than usual. She kept stroking her hand over Toko’s pussy, not focused on anything in particular but feeling the contours of her. Toko’s breath came in jerks – she kept trying to hold it.

‘I’m not looking now,’ Komaru said, slipping a finger in where Toko was wettest; Toko rolled her eyes back, and opened her legs wider, pushing her hips back against Komaru’s hand. She turned her head to the side.

‘Don’t you wanna look at me?’ Komaru said.

‘You’re too much,’ Toko said. And then, perhaps worried that was ambiguous, said, ‘Don’t stop.’

‘Okay.’ Komaru shifted so that she was more lying beside Toko than over her, but she kept her hand where it was, fingers teasing Toko’s entrance. Just how slippery Toko was made Komaru hornier too, and she pushed two fingers inside her. Toko gasped.

‘Yes!’

‘You like that?’

Toko’s breath came heavily. ‘I can take more,’ she said. That surprised Komaru, but she obliged with another finger, curling into the heat inside Toko, and thrusting her fingers in and out.

She had the heel of her palm against Toko’s clit; Toko had lost her shyness by that point, and pushed into Komaru’s touch. That was hot. Komaru found herself clenching her own thighs in turn, trying to stimulate herself that way. She squeezed her own breasts with her free hand.

‘Hey,’ Komaru said, ‘try facing me?’

‘Huh?’ Toko looked right then as if she really didn’t understand Komaru’s words; Komaru stopped fingering her, and grabbed Toko’s hand, moving it between her own legs.

‘Oooh,’ Toko said. She shifted to face Komaru better, her fingers moving over Komaru’s pussy experimentally. It felt good. Komaru leaned in to kiss her, moving her own hand back between Toko’s legs; it took some adjusting to get comfortable, but it wasn’t as if Komaru was in a hurry.

‘You’re really wet, huh,’ Toko said, her voice slightly on edge.

‘I told you,’ Komaru said, ‘it’s coz you’re sexy, Toko-chan.’ She squeezed an extra finger into Toko’s pussy, liking the way Toko felt around her.

Toko didn’t respond again, but moaned instead.

‘Do you like that?’ Komaru said, and Toko nodded. She looked so debauched, her hair clinging to the sweat on her body, her chest heaving. She rubbed her hand against Komaru without finesse, too distracted for more. It hardly mattered, with how turned on Komaru was. Just seeing Toko’s reactions, the way she rutted into Komaru’s hand, the sounds she made – that was all delicious.

Toko cried out when she came, and then she clasped a hand to her mouth, as if embarrassed to have done so.

‘No-one will hear,’ Komaru said. She withdrew her fingers, rubbing the slick Toko had left on her. ‘Just me.’ Komaru put her fingers in her mouth, to taste it; Toko gasped and batted at her hand.

‘Komaru, you can’t do that!’

‘Why not?’ Komaru said. It wasn’t as if it tasted bad.

‘Because ...’ Toko, from her expression, knew she didn’t have a good answer. So, keeping her eyes on her, Komaru licked her fingers clean. And maybe Toko was thinking about other things they might do, and why she maybe shouldn’t protest too much, because she didn’t say anything more.

Instead she remembered that she was meant to be getting Komaru off as well, and she began to touch her with renewed purpose, leaning over her so that Komaru had to lie flat. That made it easier for Toko to apply the pressure she was looking for.

‘Like that,’ Komaru said, when Toko managed to rub her clit just right. ‘Keep going.’ Her body felt hot – not just her pussy or her sensitive breasts, but her whole body down to her toes.

Toko kept going, and Komaru came too, in a wave of heat that swallowed her. She didn’t cry out like Toko had, but her body shook; she grasped at the sheets and her own skin.

‘Toko-chan,’ she said. ‘Toko-chan, I came.’

‘You did?’ Toko seemed surprised, and stopped moving her fingers.

‘Uh-huh.’ Komaru nodded slowly, rocking her hips up against Toko’s hand again. Toko still looked like she was in shock.

Komaru smiled up at her lazily, and she took Toko’s hand in hers.

‘I did it right, then?’

Komaru giggled. ‘Sure. You did it right.’

Toko blushed. She was so cute, Komaru thought. She reached her other hand to touch Toko’s lips, and then she sat up so she could kiss her sweetly.

‘I love you,’ Komaru said.

‘You ... you’re embarrassing,’ Toko said, and Komaru laughed more heartedly.

‘What?’ she said. ‘If you can’t be sentimental after sex, when can you be?’

‘You’re always ...’ Toko looked away. ‘You’re always sentimental.’

‘Well,’ Komaru, ‘then I should take the opportunity to be extra so.’ She hugged her arms round Toko’s waist, and ended up resting her head on her lap. Toko stroked her hair. She still smelt of her own arousal.

‘Gosh, I’m tired,’ Komaru said, the feeling coming over her all of a sudden.

‘You could go to sleep like this,’ Toko said, ‘but I think you’d get cold.’

‘Yeah, and it wouldn’t be very comfortable for you either.’ Komaru shut her eyes, thinking how nice it would still be. ‘We should get under the covers.’ She said it, but it was another minute before she could bring herself to move. It was nice, being petted by Toko. Even if Toko claimed to have sentimentality, she still showed Komaru her affection in so many ways. If they had sex, that was just a new way of showing the same affection.

Still, Komaru thought, it was a fun one.